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Writer's pictureMicah Syswerda

Lily's Story: Responding to a Gay Wedding with Love and Conviction


Sunrise on a asphalt road in the mountains

Lily's story is one of thoughtful contemplation, deep love, and steadfast faith. She faced a challenging situation, one that many Christians grapple with: how to respond to a wedding invitation that contradicts their biblical beliefs about marriage.


Gay Wedding on the Horizon

Lily's cousin had once asked her to be a bridesmaid at her wedding to a man. However, she called off the engagement, having realized she was a lesbian, and began dating a woman. As talk of elopement or a future wedding with her new partner surfaced, Lily knew she needed to prepare herself for the possibility of being asked to participate in her cousin's wedding.


The Complexity of the Decision

Two weeks ago, I polled around 100 people on the question, "Should Christians attend a gay wedding?" The responses were nearly evenly split among yes, no, and it depends. Lily chose the phrase "it depends." While messaging back and forth, Lily explained that a simple yes or no doesn't capture the complexity of her decision-making process. The Bible, Lily recounted, describes marriage as a covenant between one man and one woman before God. Throughout Scripture, God uses the imagery of marriage to depict His love for us, likening it to the relationship between Christ and the Church. This profound symbolism only deepens the sanctity of marriage in God's eyes. Lily's interpretation of Scripture is the lens through which she viewed the prospect of her cousin's same-sex wedding.


Seeking Discernment

As she pondered her cousin's potential invitation, Lily dove into her own beliefs, consulted scripture, and prayed for discernment. She concluded that she could not attend or be part of a same-sex marriage. To her, attending such a wedding would mean acting as a witness to a covenant that, in her view, was not in accordance with God's design.


Communicating with Love

But for Lily, it wasn't just about the decision itself—it was about how she would communicate it. She knew the conversation had to be rooted in love, not judgment or condemnation. Through her preparation, Lily was ready to tell her cousin that she would always love her, not because of her actions, but for who she is as God's daughter. Lily planned to explain that her choice to not attend the wedding was not taken lightly and was based solely on her Christian beliefs. She also intended to share her own struggles with sin, emphasizing that all sins are equal in deserving God's wrath but also in receiving His grace.


Trusting God's Plan

Lily was ready to have this difficult conversation without knowing how her cousin would react. She understood that her role in her cousin's life was part of God's plan, not hers. If her cousin became angry and distanced herself, Lily would find peace in knowing she had approached the situation with love. She prayed that the Lord would use her love as a testament to His own and that it might be the seed planted for someone else to water. That day, Lily decided she couldn't live her life under the weight of pending acceptance or rejection; the Bible tells Christians they will face rejection, and she chose to trust the Lord with her relationship with her cousin.


A Wonderful Outcome

In the end, God worked in wonderful ways. By loving her cousin through her journey of homosexuality, Lily remained a trusted confidant. After a few years, her cousin realized she wasn't living the life she wanted. She broke off the relationship with her girlfriend and has since gotten engaged to a man. Together, they are expecting a baby. Although her cousin has just begun this new chapter, Lily was the first person she told about the new relationship and pregnancy.


Hopeful for the Future

Lily recognizes that while her cousin still has room to grow in her relationship with Jesus and in surrendering her life to Him, she remains hopeful, ever-trusting in the Lord's plan for both of their lives.


How Do We Respond?

We Respond With Love and Conviction


 

Lily's story is a powerful example of how love and conviction can coexist, and how trusting in God's plan can lead to unexpected and beautiful outcomes.


After reading this, if you feel inspired to share your story (which is really God's story), please send it to me. I can write a post similar to this one! I strongly believe in the power of honest conversations through personal testimonies like Alex's and the lives of loved ones like Liv's cousin. God is at work; let's discuss it!


If you have any questions, feel free to reach out below or through the chat feature on your screen!

 

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